OPINION: GENERAL ADEYINKA ADEBAYO; DEMISE OF AN APOSTLE OF PEACE

The death of General Robert Adeyinka Adebayo father of Richard Adeniyi Adebayo came as rude shock. Why? This baba was a reference point and always ready to lend his voice and render useful and meaningful advice to issues that concern Yoruba in particular and Nigeria in general.

I had my first personal encounter with this sage and military colossus in 1993 when I was the manager in charge of promotions of KSA Holdings. King Sunny Ade was organizing his foundation (KSA foundation) and I was at the same time gathering materials for a book I was writing on him.

General Adebayo was a member of this foundation. I had an interview with him which I copied verbatim below:-

“Sunny is a nice man who respects his elders. He is humble and generous. Though I met him by accident, I have not regretted my association with him.

Ideally, I am not supposed to be a member of his foundation being his elder, because a foundation is supposed to outlive its founder, but as his ardent fan and one of the people that propped up his musical career, I don’t have other choice than to make him realize his dream.

I met him through a friend, Late Chief Adeleke Osijinrin in 1967, few days before the Nigerian civil war. I had just lost my Dad and we were looking for a juju artiste to play at the funeral ceremony after Tunde Nightingale told us of his in ability to play for us, because of his earlier commitments.

This friend of mine enthusiastically told me about this new juju sensation in Lagos called Sunny Ade, we contacted him and he played for us at Iyin – Ekiti and we all enjoyed his music.

Sunny did one thing after the show that I had never experienced before. He came to me with some of his band boys in the morning and offered me all the money they made. He said the money was their own contribution to my father’s funeral!

I was surprised by this generosity, I noticed that he came to this party in a chartered bus, so I called one of my friends who was an accountant with SCOA motors and handed the money over to him. I instructed him to give Sunny a bus when they got back to Lagos. That was how he got his first bus.”

Why did they tag him Owanbe Governor? As could be deducted in this interview, General Adebayo was a socialite and one can hardly blame him on this. The Western Region in which he took over as the second military governor in 1966 had just gone through a political turmoil.

This was the “WETIE” era; the period of bonfire when properties of political rivals were been burnt, when human lives were not worth a dime

Chief Obafemi Awolowo, who was the political leader of the region, had been sentenced to 10 years imprisonment on charges of treasonable felony by Alhaji Tafawa Balewa led Federal government. This did not go down well with his followers.

The premier of the Region, Sir Ladoke Akintola had been swept off by the first military coup of January 15, 1966. Lt. Col. Adekunle Fajuyi, who came after Akintola was later assassinated along with the military head of state, General Aguiyi Ironsi in a counter coup of July 1966 in Ibadan the capital of Western Region! Tension was high. Some of those who survived the imbroglio were thrown into jail. This was the period of Jackals.

General Adeyinka Adebayo brought hope. He brought joy. He brought peace. He needed to reach out to all the warring parties. This he did successfully in a place hitherto referred to as “Wild – Wild – West”. This made him a regular patron at social ceremonies. The tag “Owanbe” could be translated as “Was he present at the party? And the answer: “Owanbe” he was present!

General Adeyinka Adebayo had played his own role and he is probably giving accounts of his stewardship now. Adieu the ever present Governor; peace maker Baba Niyi, Baba Yoruba, our veteran war hero!

LEAN ON ME: DEAR AUNTY MEG

Dear Aunty Meg,

I want you to help me out of this my present predicament. A couple had just packed to our neighborhood. The wife happened to be my former girl friend whom I lost contact with when I left my home town several years ago. I am happily married but my wife travels a lot. She is an international trader.

This lady took advantage of this and always visited me during my lonely period. I won’t deceive you, I slept with her the last time she came visiting. I don’t want to cheat on my wife again. What should I do?

--- Tee Jay

Tee Jay,

Sleeping with another man’s wife is a sin against God and an offence punishable under the penal code of the land. You should put a stop to this illicit affair. If everyone is sleeping with his/her former lover, what would the world turn to? What would be your reaction if you suddenly catch your wife sleeping with her former lover?

You are the man; let the woman see reasons why you should stop this adulterous act. You need to pray for forgiveness and the courage to stop the illicit affair. God will help you.

---- Aunty Meg

SWIFT DR. LAZARUS

My husband, Lazarus, was an advertisement executive officer in a media house, while I sold provision materials and toiletries in a shop near our house. He lost his job through what I gathered later on to be due to his fraudulent actions. Having nothing to do again, he joined me in the shop.

He was the one that prompted me to join the health team of our church. In this team, we had trained health workers who treated church members and majored in child delivery. I soon learned the nitty – gritty of child delivery.

My husband had mis–informed the people in our area that he was a medical doctor, and that his wife was a nurse. They started bringing their pregnant women for delivery. We became popular and money kept coming in. He later abandoned me in the shop and went to rent a bungalow and erected a clinic signpost in front of the building. He said I was a thorn in his flesh. The reason being that I always taunted him with the fake life he was living. “Dr. Lazarus my foot!”

“Laz, you know, you are not a medical doctor. Why are you deceiving the people? You may end up in jail if the truth is known. Besides, our church members had been grumbling about your deceit…” Jealous woman. I know you are not happy about my progress. It is you and your family members that would go to jail, not me…” We would go on and on. He would shout me down and threatened to beat me up.

The bubble burst when a lady died during child birth in his clinic. Her family did not take it lying low with him. They got him arrested. The police requested for his certificates. He had none; therefore he could not produce any. They milked him dry. He spent close to six months in detention. We eventually rallied round and got him off the hook. He had no other option than to close down the fake clinic.

Shame could not allow him move freely in the community again. He left me and the children and relocated to another part of the city. He established a school and named it “Dr. Lazarus International School”. He sold a dummy to the people that he had PhD in Education. On hearing this, parents started withdrawing their children from the existing schools. They were registering them at Dr. Lazarus International School.

Nemesis eventually caught up with him when it was time to register students for final examination. He had boasted more than what he could handle. Pride could not allow him to approach the schools around him for guidance on the registration procedures. His school was not registered. He was still ruminating on what to do when the registration period expired. Therefore, he could not register the students. Unfortunately for him, an Uncle of one of the students was a top official in the State’s Ministry of Education. This man miffed with what happened did his investigation and realized that my husband was a fraudulent person.

Expectedly, Lazarus could not produce the registration fees he collected from the students. That was how the school was shamefully closed down and my husband ended up in the police net again.

As I am writing this, I have relocated to my home town. The shame was too much. I am thinking of divorcing Lazarus. He had got another woman. It was this lady that came to inform us about his present ordeal. Can you imagine the effrontery!

ADVENTURES OF MR. FAARI: TELEPHONE CONVERSATION

I had an appointment with Roluke as she did not come on time; I decided to wait at the hotel’s garden and was sipping my drink. As I was settling down, I took a cursory look around me. Among all the pretty faces, a particular one caught my attention.

Aa - ah! It was Tessy! This was the girl I brought here last week. I picked my phone and sent her a text message.

Mr. Faari: What do you want here again?

Tessy: Oobi! Useless man (she replied)

Mr. Faari: You are so shameless; you cannot even tell him to take you somewhere else.

Tessy: How does that concern you?

Mr. Faari: It is my concern because I used to bring you here. I own this land!

Tessy: Which land?

Mr. Faari: Tessy, you are an incorrigible prostitute.

Tessy: See me o! Kettle calling pot black!

Mr. Faari: If you annoyed me, I’ll come and create a scene at your table over there.

Tessy: You dare not. The man here is an army officer. his ADC is the one sitting behind you.

I looked at my back and saw this hefty looking guy in smart military uniform. I sulked in silence. Tessy had won this battle. Where is Roluke o?

BEHAVE RESPONSIBILITY; AIDS IS REAL!

RIPPLES!

I worked as a touring cashier in a large firm. This job exposed me to a lot of money. I used to turn this money by using them to import rice from the neighbouring countries. After deducting my gains, I always paid back the money into the company’s coffers without anybody’s knowledge.

Nemesis caught up with me when the customs officials intercepted my trucks during one of my operations. My men and drivers escaped but all my goods were seized. When I could not pay back the money at the expected time, the company invited me to face an investigative panel. At the end of the exercise, I was dismissed from the company.

At this time, I had got three children, one boy and two girls, who were twins. My wife was working in one of the government parastatals. Not long after I lost my job, I realized that my wife was being promiscuous. She was keeping late nights and attending parties almost every weekend. There was a time I saw her in a picture with another man, both of them were wearing the same type of dress. The picture was taken in a social party. When I confronted her, she claimed the guy was her colleague in her place of work. On a tip off from a friend some weeks later, I saw her with this same man at a beer joint very close to their office. This was after office hours at about 6.30pm. My friend had taken their picture. I waited in a vantage position close to their rendezvous and saw everything clearly.

When she got home that night, I confronted her with my findings. Instead of being apologetic, she blew her tops; she accused me of monitoring her movement. She said if I had got a job I would not be following her all over the place. She shouted on me calling me busy body and jobless man who could not provide for himself talk less of his family.

The illicit affairs went on unabated. On another occasion, my wife claimed she was travelling to her parent’s village over the weekend. She said she will take off after the office hours on Friday.

Something within me sensed she was not going to her parent. I therefore pre – empted her. I went to her office and waited at a restaurant opposite their office. At the closing time, I saw the staffs trouping out of the office. I saw my rival coming out as well and entering his car. Few minutes later, my wife came out carrying her travelling bag. She looked around and sighted her lover. She walked towards the car, open the door and entered. They drove out of the premises and sped out towards the out skirts of the town.

I became mad with rage. My mind went to the police emergency number I saved on my mobile phone. I dialed the number. The voice on the console answered immediately. I told him that a dare devil armed robber had just snatched my car and sped with my wife out of the town. I gave the registration number, the make and color of the car.

Few hours later, I received a call that the armed robber had been shot dead and the woman sustained serious injuries and was in coma.

Up till the time I am writing this piece, my wife has not recovered from her coma. Despite what I had gone through in the hands of these two adulterers, my conscience is still pricking me that I have overreacted.

ADVENTURES OF MR FAARI: FAARI IS BORN AGAIN!

By Femi Abulude

I have eventually followed my boss to the camp o! I was lost inside the three kilometer by three kilometer spiritual arena. I hope you are not going to ask me which camp. I did not go there for sight seeing. It was a spiritual visit which has changed my life for good. We would talk on this as time goes on. I was welcomed like a prodigal son and treated like a king.

By now you should be privy to how my boss has been preaching to me on the issue of spirit, body and soul. I have decided to forsake evil and toll the path of righteousness. I am not joking o. You don’t joke with issues that concern God. Why are you surprised? Have I done worst things than Saul who later became Paul? Was David not boasted by God as the man after his heart despite his escapades?

My boss and some of his colleagues in the family affairs ministry have been preaching to me but when two of his sisters, one in London and the other one at Maryland joined and explained to me the need to be a vessel unto honour, I made up my mind to reach out to my colleagues who are still on the fast lane. When the sister in the chamber, whom I fondly called Sister Cool saw me last week at a social function at Fadeyi she commended me by saying. “Faari trust God, you are doing great!” my joy knew no bounds.

Relax; you are not going to miss anything. My duty from now on is to give expose on my past escapades so that others can learn. Righteousness qualifies you as God’s own. See you at the top!

BEHAVE RESPONSIBLY; HEAVEN IS REAL!         

OPINION: OLUGBO’S STACCATO ON OONI STOOL.

By Femi Abulude

I was in the midst of some old friends few weeks ago mourning the demise of our beloved senior colleague, Chief Funmilola Olorunnisola, a veteran Jounalist and Broadcaster.The late press affair director to the late Ooni Okunade Sijuade. One thing led to another and I was asked to state my candid opinion on the staccato of Olugbo, Oba Obateru Akinruntan on the Ooni stool. This is my presentation.

It is a known fact the then Prince Obateru Akinruntan was a wealthy petrol magnate respected by all. Young folks looked up to him as a worthy role model. He did not hide his passion for power. This quest to mount the paramount stool of Olugbo was fierce. He did not hide his ambition to become the Oba of this town Ugbo in Ondo State. This seemed a mirage because there was an incumbent ruler; Oba Mafimisebi.

Against all odds, Obateru eventually became the Oba of Ugbo. One of the people who made this happened was the late Ooni of Ife, Oba Okunade Sijuade. I personally witnessed some of his visits to the revered palace. He was officially introduced as the Crown Prince at a special event organized by World Information Agents at the Ooni’s palace. He made a generous donation on this special occasion tagged “The gathering of Yoruba leaders” It was on record that he was almost lynched when his motorcycle was mistaken for that of Ooni during the Ife-Modakeke war. That was how regular his visits to Ife was on his life ambition.

Throughout his guest for Obaship, Obateru never mentioned his superiority over the stool of Ooni. When the reigning Ooni was installed, he went around the Yorubaland on peaceful mission. It was a matter of irony that Oba Obateru Akinruntan was chosen as the chairman of the peace committee saddled with the responsibilities of maintaining a lasting peace among the Yoruba.

What brought out the real Obateru was a statement from the Ooni that Moremi was a goddess

and a heroine of note in Yorubaland. A 42 foot statute was built in her honour at Ile-Ife.

Obateru countered that this was unguarded statement and historical fallacy. He claimed the Ugbo were the aboriginal settlers and owners of Ile-Ife. He alleged that Moremi was a slave captured by Ugbo warriors during one of their many raids on Ile-Ife town. He added that this unfaithful woman betrayed her husband’s trust when she exposed the secret of the Ugbo warriors.

This latter day assertion negates the general belief and history of Yoruba. The Yoruba regarded the then Ugbo invaders as terrorists. Moremi decided to unravel their secrets. She volunteered to be captured by the Ugbos. After accomplishing her mission, she escaped back to Ile-Ife and revealed the secrets. When the Ugbos invaders came as usual to invade the Ife, they met their waterloo! That was the end of terrorism in Yorubaland.

Where Obateru got his latest version of history that exposed his parochial thoughts is still surprising. What he wanted to achieve with this fallacy is yet to be known.